You Matter
Just last week, I took a spontaneous trip to Trader Joe’s after a long day at work. I decided that some fresh blooms and a good bottle of rosé would remedy the evening. As I approached the register, the clerk looked at me smirked. “Have any hot plans tonight?” he queried. With a genuine and all-too-familiar laugh, I admitted that those goodies were all for me. “Treat yo self,” he assured me. His response was as quick and intuitive as a coach’s reassuring pep talk to one of his players- “You’ll get ‘em next time, sport.” For some context, “Treat yo self” was a catchphrase first made famous by the television show Parks and Recreation in 2011, when Tom Haverford, portrayed by Aziz Ansari, and Donna Meagle, portrayed by Retta, celebrate their annual “Treat Yo Self” Day by splurging on clothes, messages, and any other of life’s pleasures. Since then, the phrase has gone viral. But, amid the humor and the playfulness that the phrase implies, there rings a bit of sincerity to it. When do we actually treat ourselves? Do we focus on ourselves, on our own growth? Or, do we shy away from it, convincing ourselves that prioritizing our own growth is in some way selfish? Can we allow ourselves to prioritize what fills our souls and grows our character? In one of my favorite passages from the novel, Eat, Pray, Love, Liz seeks to answer this question, saying,
“I did not know yet what I deserved. I still maybe don’t fully know what I deserve. But I do know that I have collected myself of late- through the enjoyment of harmless pleasures- into somebody much more intact. The easiest, most fundamentally human way to say it is that I have put on weight. I exist more now than I did four months ago. I will leave [this place, experience, season, etc.] noticeably bigger than when I arrived here. And I will leave with the hope that the expansion of one person- the magnification of one life- is indeed an act of worth in this world. Even if that life, just this one time, happens to be nobody’s but my own.”
This month, we have explored topics of exploring our happiness, practicing devotion, and finding a necessary balance between the two. Using the novel Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, we have examined the depths of our souls, the longings of our hearts, and the directions of our dreams. We have found that we can become empowered to pursue our dreams, to secure our happiness, and to allow our faith and devotion to carve deeper crevices of meaning in our lives. But, we must always remember that the belief in our worth is the nourishment by which the roots of change and transformation can spread forth into our lives. We can chase after our dreams until our hearts grow weary, we can endlessly pursue what we believe will make us happy, and we can expend our energy to our devotion or faith. But, all these endeavors will not lead us to find the peace and joy of our hearts unless we are prompted by confidently believing in our worth.
This lesson of self-discovery is paralleled even in the way that I came to read this gripping tale of another woman’s quest to find herself. I acquired my copy of Elizabeth Gilbert’s famous novel from a second-hand bookstore. I love my copy of her novel because it has been worn, torn, and loved by a complete stranger before it was even placed into my hands. With each page turned, each convicting phrase and transparent story underlined, I got a sense of the story of the book’s previous owner. Stumbling upon this unique copy also came at a crucial point in my life. I had just returned home from a study-abroad trip in Cape Town, South Africa- a beautiful place I had learned to call my home for five months. It seemed, then, that not only was a captivating and life-altering story about to unfold before me, but also the way in which this tale affected the previous book-owner. It was the collision of these multiple worlds, the experience of the author, of the previous book-owner, and of my own ventures abroad that would significantly affect the way I would perceive the world. You see, we all have a story to tell. Better yet, the worth of each of our stories is insurmountable. The wears and tears on each of our pages, the highlighted portions, the important events, the memorable quotes, the tearjerkers, the relatable characters, the cameo appearances, and the inspirational revelations are all things that make each of our stories unique. Our individual plotlines are unlike anything experienced before. Those things altogether make each of our stories invaluable. We must only, then, begin to learn how to tell them.In telling your story and driving your plotline, treat yourself to an incredible, adventurous, and incandescently beautiful life. Chase after your dreams, pursue what makes you happy, grow in your faith, find and grow secure in your contentment, and do all these things based off the belief of you worth. Live your life in such a radiant way, even if sometimes it is for no other person than yourself. Breathe life into your unique story. Believe that you matter. And, go boldly in the direction that your life is leading you. Treat yourself to the enjoyment of your unique and vibrant life.